I’m sorry I had to let you go.
I’m sorry I couldn’t see it was time
For you to be released from wrecked body
That lived a fuller life then many people

I just wanted to find the person I was
I just wanted to find that tenderness
I used to be capable of
So everything would better again

I could only see my imperfections
I could only see my failures
I could only see my weaknesses
I could only see you deserved better

I kept telling myself
I kept convincing myself
If I were just a better person
If I could just get us a better place
I could take away your pain
I could make it all better
I could make everything okay again

I couldn’t see that I could never cure you
I couldn’t see that when I comforted you
It was only comfort
I could never take away
The hurt you felt everyday
I couldn’t see
You were never again going to be free
Within your body

Your last days
When I opened my eyes
Your body allowed you peace
You were able to enjoy
The finish line with sun and goldfish

As I hear people being shot a block over
As I see people attacking each other
Out of fear for death
For losing from the tiniest of foes
As I strain to see through my tears
For the realization long overdue
I can feel the relief
I can feel the joy
I can feel the blessings
Of your last days
Feeling the promise of peace
Finally coming to life

I’m sorry I was so blind
I’m sorry I kept trying to slam us
Through the wall that was never
Going to give

I am a better person
Havin’ gotten to live with you
You showed so much wonderful
I am capable of
Of which is in me
I was so selfish to not see
It was time to live those lessons
Without you in my lap

I thought I could be perfect
To make everything better
The time came
I had to let you be perfect
So you could be better

Thank you Leesha Lei
Thank you for being an example
Thank you for being a teacher
Thank you for being a star
In the brightest constellation
Of my heavens
Thank you